cut. it. out.

why is it so hard to cut people out of your life who are useless yet so easy to cut people out who matter? the answer is entertainment purposes.

i had an epiphany today. i decided that people who don't need me in their lives -- or at the very least make absolutely no effort, regardless of if they care about me or not -- don't deserve a place in mine.

i've come to this conclusion before. but then i'll call or write on a wall or think, 'well, i'm bored, wonder what they're doing...' but no more. because really, it's just drama. or annoyance. and who the hell wants that? i'd rather have two important people than twenty useless people that are just bodies to entertain me in a bar. or small apartment space. or car. wherever.

but again, i've had this epiphany before. maybe i can make it last more than 48 hours this time.

after all, the mets fired jerry manuel and omar minaya. i have bigger fish to fry on this blog, now don't i?

Brett, who?

Dear Brett Favre,

None of us are surprised. If you were any more of a drama queen, you'd be a Hollywood actor. We all knew you were coming back. You love the game. You want to win a Super Bowl ring with the Minnesota Vikings. 

But do you really need this drawn out story every damn year? At least you didn't plan a primetime press conference like Lebron James and your photos aren't being ripped down by anyone in the Metrodome vicinity. I even own a Green Pay Backers #4 t-shirt. Hey, I was thrilled when you came to the New York Jets, even though we all knew you were an old man who was only going to last one year when they didn't have a shot at the playoffs.

This drawn out announcement year after year has got to stop. Now just get to the Championship, finish your 20th season, and call it a day. For the sake of all NFL fans. The Sportscenter coverage is just getting boring now. 

Sincerely,

Emily

friends with an ex: brilliant idea or demented and stupid? discuss.

i haven't decided if it's possible to be friends with an ex. i always say i want to be because these people were important to me at one point in my life, and i'd guess yours were important to you at once point as well. you wouldn't have been with them if you thought they were shmucks to begin with, unless you have some sort of self-destruction complex. ironically, i do -- but more on that at a later time, eh?

but is the fact that at one point in your life they were exactly what you wanted or needed any reason to keep them around? i've been completely willing to cut off friends who did horrible or truly stupid things. but exes? i can't do it. maybe it's because i do still have feelings. maybe it's because these guys were much closer to me than any friends could be, for obvious reasons. or maybe it's because i hate two things: change and not being in control. cutting off an ex would mean changing a once decent relationship to nothing (which it is at this point anyway, right?) and not being in control of the situation.

i have the belief that if you had feelings once, you always have them or you never had feelings at all. but i also don't like not talking to people anymore. i feel like everyone is in your life for a reason, not that they passed through and should never come by again. that doesn't mean the second the come around again you want to jump them. it simply means keeping friends as friends - whether they were friends with benefits, boyfriends, or boy friends.

or i just live in my own fantasy bubble where you can get along with whoever you want and dismiss all the people you can't stand.

my bubble is a very pretty place.

hi. my name is emily, and i like emo music.

i went to warped tour. the 15-year-old in me was thrilled, namely because the 15-year-old in me never went to warped tour. see, none of my friends like the same music i do. never have. okay, that's not entirely true... kayla likes counting crows. heather likes dashboard confessional. andy likes dave matthews band. jess likes fall out boy, but they're on "hiatus."

but my emo/pop punk/punk? harldy anyone. i love my emo music. it makes me feel better, namely when i pretend i can sing and could be in a band. yeah, pink helped, but hey monday's "candles" got me through a break up. motion city soundtrack writes metaphors i wish i could come up with. and fall out boy is damn fuckin' catchy. but i'm not 15 anymore, which means the only people who really admit to liking this music - if they're over the age of 23 - are in the bands. or work for the bands. or tour with the bands. basically, they're everyone i want to be. the fact that people figured out how to tour 24/7, 365 days a week and be in an industry where no one questions how tattooed or pierced they are is mind boggling to me.

i don't want to be the girl who shows up to shows and concerts by myself, but should i avoid going to shows because people don't want to go with me or don't like the same music? should i be afraid to show up to hear music i like because i don't have any musical kindred spirits? or should i just stop listening to it because, hey, i may work for a teen magazine but i'm not a teen anymore?

what i have to figure out is how to find people who do like the same things i do. i'm so used to having the same friends i've had for years, since elementary school or the first day of college. and i love my friends, but it's strange to be into music no one's ever heard of or not look quite like everyone else you know. i don't want to be normal. i don't want to not pierce every damn piece of my ear lobes. but it's so weird to not have people quite understand. this isn't a woe-is-me post. this is more like a "what the fuck" or "why has everyone else figured out who they are or where they want to be" post.

or maybe this is just, "why couldn't i have a good voice so i could be a rockstar" post. maybe i should just start practicing on that target guitar i have - that'd probably be a better start than whining.

excuse me, sir, which way to maine?

when anything is going wrong in my life, i feel the need to drive. do not listen to anyone says you can't run away from your problems because, honey, if skipping town for two hours will make you feel better, then log as many miles as you need to. yes, your problems will still be there when you get back, but hell, at least you enjoyed those two hours.

i mean, i enjoyed my eight hours. normally i run away all by myself, but i dragged leah and amanda along on my last road trip for two reasons: one, nothing was actually wrong in my life at that particular moment, and two, it was completely spontaneous. at 11:30 p.m., i came up with the brilliant idea that we could get to maine and back in time for both amanda and i to be back for our family obligations the next day. sure, we'd be on no sleep, but we'd be back in time.

we left at midnight. we blasted miley songs. no one was on the road. i downed the biggest coffee mcdonald's had that wouldn't give me the jitters. we took pictures. it was the most ridiculous, strange thing we could've done, but here's the thing - when else am i going to be able to get in a car and drive with my best friends for absolutely no reason other than the fact that this will make a really good story?

plus i have a list of things i want to do. (doesn't everyone?) number one on that list is visit all 50 states. until a week ago, i had never been to new hampshire or maine.

mission accomplished. i still have a few states to go, but i'm one step closer to achieving something on that list. and with everything that's gone on in that last year, that step is a pretty important one right now.

poetic flow and bracket busters

ever have so many thoughts that you think, 'if i just sat down to write them all i'd be here forever?' i think that's why i haven't updated my blog in two months. that or i'm lazy. or easily distracted by dumb things like life and boys and saint patrick's day beads. (which is a collection i added mightily to this year, and i didn't have to flash one boob to do it, thank you very much -- it's not mardi gras, people, it's saint patrick's day.)

what i've realized this week is what everybody already knows -- the people you don't want in your life are the ones who call, text, appear at random hours when you don't want them to. the people you do want around are the ones who don't respond when you are the one calling, texting, or appearing (actually, i've never appeared at random hours, but i couldn't just break that poetic flow).

except for your best friends and your family. they're around all the time. they know you better than anyone else, whether you wish they did or not. your best attributes, your faults. the job you probably should be doing, the boy you probably should be with, the cookie you probably shouldn't be eating, the road you probably should be taking. they're the people you probably should be listening to and hopefully, they're the people you are listening to. at least i did this weekend. maybe not on every topic discussed, but on many. on most. most of the time, we listen to everything but take in only what we care to hear -- it doesn't matter who is on the other end of the conversation. it's not that we talk just to hear ourselves talk. sometimes we just don't want to listen to our own advice. sometimes we hope someone we trust will give us advice that just sounds better but truth be told, if they're that good a friend, anything they're telling us is probably exactly what we knew all along. sucks ass, right?

but if you think i won't be staring and yelling at my phone, you've got another thing coming. just because i listen doesn't mean i learn any lessons. at least not today. after all, i am still just a 25-year-old girl. albeit one who probably kicked your ass because she did, in fact, have ohio university in the first round of her march madness pool.

Darrelle Revis is my hero

I am beyond excited for today's afternoon game. Okay, yes, part of the reason is because I am very simply a Jets fan. The Jets Nation is used to disappointment, failure, regret. Really, really stupid losses that should have been wins (please reference the game vs. Atlanta as the most recent checkpoint on that list).

But there is a beacon of hope for Jets Nation. And no, it's just just that they're about to begin their second game in the 2009 Playoffs. That beacon of hope has a specific name: Darrelle Revis. And I am a fan of his on Facebook.

Darrelle Revis should have been the defensive player of the year. Despite shutting down New England's Randy Moss, Buffalo's Terrell Owens, Carolina's Steve Smith, Houston's Andre Johnson, Indianapolis' Reggie Wayne, and New Orleans' Marques Colston, and actually causing Cincinnati's Chad Ochicinco to shut his mouth (almost as impossible as shutting him down), Revis lost out to Green Bay's Charles Woodson.

"This, in my opinion, was the best year a corner has ever had, the most impact a corner has ever had in the National Football League," Jets head coach Rex Ryan said. "That's my opinion. Apparently that wasn't how everybody felt."

Well, that's how I feel and that's how the rest of Jets Nation feels. None of those big names Revis shut down had more than five catches or 35 yards against Revis, and only one scored a touchdown. And the guy is only 24. If anyone should have swagger, it's Revis. I know Philip Rivers is good and the San Diego Chargers will bring everything they have today, but it's not rookie Mark Sanchez who gives me hope -- it's Revis.

LT catches that pass!

Right now I consider the San Diego Chargers to be the equivalent of Voldemort (you know, he who shall not be named), but I had to post on LaDainian Tomlinson. I know, I know. He's the enemy. He reached 100 TD passes faster than any other player in history. He's going to test the #1 New York Jets defense like no one else will this Sunday.

But before he does that, he's going to dance:

Thank you, LT, for that how to be a running back lesson for
dummies - you read the defense, side step four times, then
catch that pass (catch that pass). Oh, and don't forget to say
hi to mom! Someone give me a pigskin and the first version
of Final Cut Pro ever invented 'cause I wanna be just like LT!

I hope when he's on the field, he has disco music playing in his
head every time he reads the defense. I really, really do.

Photo: Courtesy of The Washington Post

I'll put $40 on the Jets. That's right, i said the Jets.

I just got back from Las Vegas. Normally that one sentence would be enough to not conjure up a few ideas in your head or make up my entire post and you'd all be perfectly happy. But I'm not going to write about any debauchery (though I did win the majority of my money on a Playboy penny slot machine at the Excalibur). Why? I was sick for the first 72 hours of it with a cold that had knocked me flat on my feet for 5 straight days, long before I had even set foot in Vegas.

Plus, the New York Jets were playing. That's right, the New York Jets were in the playoffs. The only thing I talked about for six straight days was how I was determined to watch this game while in Las Vegas. I don't care if all a long the strip there were women dressed in flamingo costumes, little foreign men snapping cards of naked women at us, $1 margarita stands as far as the eye could see. No, no - the Jets who started off 3-0 before they decided to break our hearts and make us wonder why the hell a rookie named Mark Sanchez felt the need to eat a hot dog on the sideline and constantly overturn the ball.

This was a team that beat the previously undefeated Indianapolis Colts and then convinced themselves that they had no hope after they lost to the Atlanta Falcons, a pathetic game they should have won but, being the good ol' Jets, did not. "We're obviously out of the playoffs, and that's unfortunate," head coach Rex Ryan said. But statistically, they were in -- and went on to beat Cleveland in the regular season, thus letting me sit in a bar drinking $2 Miller Lites, screaming at the TV whenever Sanchez didn't complete a pass.

But I was the only one screaming. I was the only Jets fan in the bar. The only one in the bar! I'm not sure how I got out-numbered by Cleveland fans in Las Vegas, but let me tell you, despite the dirty looks I got for cheering when the Jets took a knee with 1:30 left to go in the game, I was the only one who walked out of that bar with a huge grin on my face because I had put money on my team to win.

Take that, fairweather fans. See ya in San Diego. Well, New Jersey. I mean, hello, I was just in Las Vegas - how much traveling do you think I'm doing?